It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
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