So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
