I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
