Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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