Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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