Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
