AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
