Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
