So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
