You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
