well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
