white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
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