She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
