why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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