...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
