I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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