So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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