Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
