Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Randomize
