Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
