i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
