You work out of a Hotel?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
