Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
