at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
i black out too much to be "responsible"
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
