Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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