I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
