she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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