Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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