I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
