Midget sex pt 2 tonight
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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