He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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