Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
