is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Randomize
