Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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