Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Randomize
