Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
this just has baby written all over it
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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