im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Small penises have feelings too.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
