We're like a lot better than the average bears
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I will be naked everywhere
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
