Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize