I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
