loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize