Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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