had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
