I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
