it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
it's like heaven, but drunker
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
whose parrot is this?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize