i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
