therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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