Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
