She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
