She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
