I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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