just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
